Lately I have been getting emails from companies that are peddling teacher's gifts. Really, gifts for teachers? Shouldn't having the privilege to teach my child be gift enough?
I guess not. I do give gifts, but I wish I could just give my August Morgan Cocktail Napkins as it would save me the hassle from leaving my house and the napkins are conveniently strewn from room to room.
But would that be appropriate? No. But let's suspend disbelief and pretend we are giving my napkins to imaginary teachers. And we are writing imaginary notes to imaginary teachers. Yes, let's suspend disbelief because I have one child away on a school trip and another playing soccer with my housekeeper inside my house and I have time to myself.
Now all of my children's current teachers are fabulous, naturally. But I have had some mean and strict teachers. Pobody's Nerfect, as someone said some time. Hence let the pretend gift giving begin!
Dear Ms. X : Thanks for a great year. I, personally, do not believe you ever came to school plastered.
Mr. B : Either pass my child or I swear Owl Have Another child that you have to teach.
Mrs. O : Thank you for your years as a teacher, but it's time to retire. Also, your denim jumper needs to be burned.
